The show must go on
by Mila1997
Summary: (Movieverse) The story is set right after they board the ship. It follows Olive and the other kids on their journey to find a new home while the redhead tries to figure out her feelings and newly changed relationship with Enoch.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello and thank you for choosing to read my first attempt at writing about Enolive.**

**I fear the characters are all pretty OOC but I am trying.**

**I also hope, you aren't too put off by any grammatical errors or mixed up tenses. English isn't my first language, so just let me know!**

**I hope you enjoy reading though and leave me a comment or two**

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The mood once we all boarded the ship, was a mixture of excitement and sadness.

Jakob and Miss Peregrine were gone but so were Barron and the Hollows.

The knowledge that Jakob was on his way to see Abe again and Miss Peregrine would – hopefully – return to us, didn't make it less sad.

But there wasn't much time for me to think about it. With Miss Peregrine gone and Emma heartbroken, the care for the kids fell to Enoch and me.

Just how it was at home, everyone got a task to help get the ship ready to sail. For now, our highest priority was that everyone had a place to sleep and we had enough food to last a few weeks.

While Enoch and Emma stayed at the ship with Bronwen and the twins, I took the other kids to town. Blackwood tower was occupied by the military but there were still lots of tourists and shops in town so we could buy some food and stuff like clothes and blankets.

The morning after our loop disappeared and the house was burned to ashes, Jakob and Enoch had gone back to search for anything that could help us in freeing Miss Peregrine and the Ymbrynes and luckily, they found a box with some money. It wasn't a lot but enough so we could buy seams for Fiona to grow vegetables and a set of clothes as well as a blanket for everyone.

When we returned, Enochs skeletons and Bronwyn had cleaned out the huge ballroom and moved beds into one part of it and a huge table into the other one, they had even managed to find some sofas. It really appeared as a wonder that some of the furniture was still useful once Emma blow-dried them.

The situation was far from perfect but in the evening, we could all sit down around the table in a warm room with a bowl of soup in front of us.

"Where are we going to go now?" Millard eventually breaks the silence.

Immediately all eyes wandered between Emma, Enough and me but while I had no idea and Emma was barely paying attention, Enough lets out a deep breath.

He looks troubled, even more so than usual, when he speaks. "I think, we should sail to Scotland and find my old loop."

Obviously this must have caught Emmas attention as she turns to look at him. "Your old loop? Are you sure, Enoch?"

The concern that's clearly written on her face, worries me. Enoch never spoke about his life before he came into Miss Peregrines care, at least not to me.

It hurts me that he obviously had more faith in Emma but now is not the time to dwell on it. I am his girlfriend after all. And even before that I was the one who assisted him with all of his needs and desires for the past 70 years.

This doesn't make his lack of trust in me hurt less though, so I cast my gaze down to hide it. I don't want to concern the kids with my stupid jealousy.

"What choice do we have?" Enoch raises his voice and a spoon clatters on the porcelain. Even without looking at him, I can almost see how his hands have balled into fists, angrily resting besides his plate and the annoyed scowl on his lips as he narrows his eyes at the other girl. "Who knows when Miss Peregrine will return and we can't stay on this ship forever. We need money and Esme has it."

„Who is Esme?" Millard, being ever so curious, asks.

There is silence as everyone waits for Enoch to answer.

"Esme is an Ymbryne, I lived in her loop for several years." Enoch eventually answers in a sour voice. "Well in Miss Falcons loop before she was killed by a hollow and Esme took control."

This causes me to look up and sneak a glance at Enoch.

If Esme was an Ymbryne, why would he refer to her by her first name? Miss Peregrine is like our mother but we were never allowed to call her Alma.

The only explanation would be that he knew her before she turned into an Ymbryne. And just like that my mind drifts to dark places and a deep fear that kept to me through all these years.

What if he liked Esme? What if she was his girlfriend back then? What if he'll replace me? We just found together after that wight tried to kill me. He finally saw me as more than an assistant or lover.

"How can you be sure her loop still exists?" Emma interjects before I get a chance to make a fool of myself. "It's been almost 90 years, Enoch."

I cast a glance at the boy in question. His face remains impassive as he shrugs, picking his spoon up again. "Miss Peregrine never mentioned that Esmes loop closed. So unless, you have a better idea, we'll set off tomorrow."

And just like that the decision was made. Tomorrow, we'd leave for Scotland to meet this Ymbryne and ask for her help.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, I get up with the first rays of sunlight.

The little ones and Enoch are still sleeping, while Emma snuck off in the middle of the night.

I couldn't really blame her. If I were in her situation, I'd be unable to sleep either. It must be awful to not only have lost Abe all these years ago, but that history was repeating itself with Jakob now.

In an attempt to not wake anyone, I tiptoe out of the ballroom and into the nearby kitchen. It was still in a desolate shape but we managed to find a kettle, several pots and dinnerware that we could use.

So I got to work and set the table for breakfast. We would have a long journey ahead of us and it was better to start it with a full belly.

But while I boiled some water for tea, my thoughts kept drifting away.

I was barely able to catch any sleep last night, because I couldn't stop thinking about Esme. If she was Miss Falcons trainee when she took over the loop, she must be very young. Usually Ymbrynes were about twenty once their training was complete but this one must be even younger. I wonder what bird she resembles, it was certainly a pretty one.

"The water is boiling over." Enoch's hoarse voice startles me. I didn't even hear him as he approached me, leaning against the kitchen counter next to me. His hair was unkempt and he looked sleepy as he took a sip of milk straight from the bottle. "You weren't in bed when I woke."

He looks so attractive like this, not that he usually doesn't. I wish, I could throw myself in his arms and kiss him senseless, so he doesn't even think about that Esme again, but modesty kept me from it. He wouldn't welcome it anyways. I know, he desires me but only on his terms.

Every kiss, every touch, all the times I ignored decorum and gave myself to him, it was always under his conditions.

I didn't regret it, how could I? Enoch is the love of my life. The moment I met him, I knew he was the one for me.

Admittingly, it wasn't easy at first to see through his act and keep up with his moods but it was worth it. He is worth it.

"I was barely able to sleep." I missed your embrace as I fell asleep. "I am not used to Horace' snoring or the humming of Hugh's bees." Only to your hot breath on my neck that feels like a lullaby against my tender skin.

"Claire climbed in with me last night." He rolls his eyes but I can see the affection in it. He adores Claire just as much as she looks up to him. "For someone so small, she took up quite a lot of space."

A small giggle escapes my lips. The thought of tiny Claire kicking Enoch out of bed and stealing his blankets is too adorable.

Enoch raises an eyebrow at my giggles but then reaches out and tugs a strand of my hair behind my ear. He rests his warm hand behind my neck and pulls me close to him. It takes all of my self-control to not touch him but I am not wearing my gloves. "I don't see what's so funny." Enoch is so close now that I can feel his hot breath on my face. His gruff voice sends a shiver down my spine. Before I can restrain myself, I lean forward in an attempt to capture his full lips with mine but he pulls back ever so slightly.

Heaven forbid, he's teasing me!

"Please!" A tiny whimper escapes my lips when my second try also fails.

His deep chuckles vibrate through my whole body when he finally presses his lips against mine. His fingers feel like they are burning through my clothes as his hand wanders from my neck down my spine until he reaches the small of my back. I can feel him grab the thin fabric of my dress as he presses me against his body, never breaking our kiss.

I want this moment of togetherness to last forever but only seconds later, I can hear voices moving towards us.

It pains me to pull away from Enoch. Who knows when the next time I get to spend some time with him on my own will be.

I can feel a blush rise on my cheeks, the moment Hugh pushes open the door to the kitchen. I am still leaning against the counter, trying to catch my breath while Enoch acts like nothing happened and picks up the kettle.

"Breakfast is ready." He pushes through the crowd of kids and towards the ballroom. While the twins as well as Claire and Bronwyn follow him eagerly, Fiona looks at me with concern written on her soft features.

"Are you okay, Olive? Did you fight?"

Before I get a chance to make up an excuse, Horace snorts in that snotty way only he could manage. "Quite the opposite, Fiona, they kissed, I saw it in one of my dreams."

"Oh." Now it's Fiona's turn to blush. She looks utterly embarrassed as her eyes cast a glance at Hugh for the fracture of a second.

I use this moment of distraction to hand a pot with boiled eggs and bacon to Horace and another one with baked beans to Hugh. "You heard Enoch, breakfast is ready."

I grab my gloves from the counter and quickly pull them on before taking the milk and ushering the kids to the ballroom.

Breakfast was a rather loud affair.

The kids were loudly questioning where Emma was and started making plans to cheer her up after Millard explained, she was probably sad because Jakob left and would want to be alone.

When everyone was done eating, Enoch clears his throat.

"Horace and Millard, you two clean the dishes. Olive, you go and light up the ovens. Fiona and Hugh, you go on deck to grow vegetables for dinner tonight." He then turns to the four little ones. "You can join me on the bridge."

I am glad that Enoch took control of the situation. He is good at giving commands after practising it with his homunculi for years.

We are all about to leave for our individual tasks when the door to the ballroom flies open.

As soon as I recognise the two people standing there, my eyes widen in surprise and excitement.

"Jakob!" Claire and Bronwyn squeal at the exact same moment, dashing towards the boy with the twins on their heels and engulfing him in a huge hug.


	3. Chapter 3

Two hours later, the whole ship was buzzing with excitement as we finally started our journey to Scotland.

The fact that Jakob had returned, gave all of us new hope that Miss Peregrine would also return to us.

Well everyone was excited except of me. I was still dreading the thought of going to Scotland to ask for Esme's help.

I still didn't get the opportunity to question Enoch about her and honestly, I feared what his reply would be.

"So Jakob", I look down at the plate I was cleaning, in an attempt to make it sound like a passing mention. "You met this Ymbryne already? You know, the one in Scotland, Esme."

Jakob had told us about his travels over lunch and apparently he was in Enoch's old loop not that long ago.

As soon as I heard about it, a plan formed in my mind. Maybe I could get my answers from Jakob without having to confront Enoch.

Of course, Enoch wasn't all too happy when I volunteered to do the dishes with Jakob after lunch but for once, he didn't cause a scene.

"Yes, I did. I think she could really help us." He hesitates though when he takes the plate from me to dry it off. "She's different though."

"Different? You mean peculiar?"

"No, different." Jakob shakes his head after another thoughtful moment passed. "She's only seventeen and she's in love with one of her wards."

This catches my attention. What if Enoch left her loop because she rejected him? What if he was in love with her but she didn't return his feelings?

"Oh really? Isn't such a relationship forbidden?" I ask Jakob but honestly, I couldn't care less. As long as she had that boy, she would hopefully stay away from Enoch.

"Olive? What is this really about?" Just like Abe, Jakob seemed to see right through my act. He puts down the plate and grabs my wrists, turning me so I'd have to look at him.

Tears well up in my eyes as I turn away from him, leaning myself on the counter for support. "It's Enoch's old loop. He never told me about it but Emma seemed concerned when he suggested going there."

"So what's the problem?" Jakob asks me, confused. "There could be a hundred reasons, he left. He doesn't seem like much of a talker."

"You wouldn't understand." I try my best to fight back my tears.

"Try to explain it." He suggests in such a kind manner that I actually consider his offer.

I mean what do I have to lose? I'll make a fool of myself for how ridiculous I am probably am, but Jakob is Abe's grandson and Abe was my friend.

He always had an open ear for me and never judged me, not even when I told him what happened between Enoch and me. Oh what a bittersweet shame I felt for doing something so sinful, although it felt right to me. If Enoch knew that I confided in Abe, he'd have killed him or at least tried to attack him with his homunculi.

"Is she pretty? Esme, I mean. I bet she is gorgeous." I can't help but let out a bitter, choked up laugh. "What do I have to hold against a woman like her? I bet, she could snip her fingers and take him away from me." I let out an ugly snort before wiping my nose with my hand. "I mean Enoch and I have been messing around for such a long time. He never told me how he feels or what this thing even is for him. What if he grows tired of me once there are other options around?"

Jakob stays silent for such a long time, a new round of tears streams down my face.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid me. I should have known, I'll make a fool of myself. He's not his grandfather after all but his own person.

"Do you really believe what you are saying?" He eventually breaks my stream of thoughts. "Because that's ridiculous, Olive. I mean, I don't really know Enoch or much about your relationship but if he was really tired of you, he wouldn't get that jealous. Apart from that, you are pretty and kind with a fascinating peculiarity, Enoch would be a fool to replace you with some bird."

The way Jakob calls that Ymbryne a bird makes me laugh. It doesn't make me feel less worried about her but not that threatened anymore either.

"Thank you, Jakob." I wipe my eyes before pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. "It's been a while since I had someone to talk to."

"You're welcome." He smiles at me.

After that we finish our chore in a comfortable silence and join the others on the bridge.

"What took you so long?" Immediately Enoch is sending death stares at Jakob again.

"It was a lot of dishes." It wasn't even a lie, 12 people caused a lot of work.

"Why are you lying, Olive?" Enoch lowers his voice, grabbing my chin and forcing me to look at him. "Do you think I am stupid and can't see your puffy, red eyes?"

Actually, I didn't think he'd pay enough attention to me to notice. But I couldn't exactly tell him that.

"Fine, I cried." I pull away from him roughly and step towards the windows out of his reach.

Enoch barks at Millard, who was bend over a map with Horace, to take over the steering wheel. Only seconds later, I can hear his footsteps approach me. "We need to talk, Olive. Now."

"I don't want to." I clear my throat, willing it not to break.

"Olive." He repeats more firmly, almost in a warning tone.

My resolution begins to grumble but I am not ready to give in just yet. "I said no. Unless you'll tell me about Esme, I am not in the mood to talk to you."

With that I run off, just leaving him standing there. Maybe it's a childish reaction but I can't help it. He's jealous of Jakob while he's the who is keeping things from me.

My feet move on their own terms and lead me up onto the deck where I hide behind one of the chimneys.

Right now, I just want to be alone.


	4. Chapter 4

Looking back at it now, several hours later, my reaction to Enoch's attempt to talk to me, was ridiculous.

Just again, I managed to make a complete fool of myself. It wouldn't surprise me if he actually chose to replace me after this.

The only thing I could do now was damage control. So I swallow my pride and go looking for him.

The kids were all gathered in the makeshift living room to watch one of Horace' projections but Enoch had left before it started.

On one hand, this could be a hint that he wants to be alone but I really needed to apologize before I loose my courage again.

Just like I expected, Enoch was once again on the bridge to make sure we were still on the right course.

Jakob and him had managed to work out shifts in which they'd take control so somebody was always on the lookout. Emma offered to take some over as well but both boys were against it, much to her dismay.

"What do you want, Olive?" Enoch doesn't even bother to turn around.

I can hear the irritation in his voice and can only imagine the deep scowl on his lips.

"I wanted to apologize for running away." Slowly, I walk closer to him until I can wrap my arms around his middle.

It's a risky thing to do as he'll probably tense up even more but I have to try it.

"It was childish", he sighs when he actually lets himself relax in my embrace. "Why were you even that upset?"

I snuggle against his back and bury my face between his shoulder plates. "It's probably stupid", I mutter into the scratchy fabric of his wool waistcoat.

"Just tell me." Enoch rubs my arm in an attempt to reassure me.

"Who is Esme? Why was Emma so concerned when you mentioned her?" Unable to hold it back any longer, the questions just burst out.

He lets out a scoff and pulls out of my embrace. All of a sudden I feel cold without his warmth. I knew, it was a stupid thing to ask. I should have just stayed quiet.

But instead of just ignoring my question or telling me off for it, Enoch leads me towards the table and lifts me onto it.

"Listen, Olive", he stands in front of me, "Esme is nobody. Well at least nobody you have to worry about. She is my younger sister and our last encounter didn't end well, that's why Emma is concerned. And that's also all you need to know about it." And then to add authority to the end of our conversation, he pulls me closer and kisses me deeply.

There are still so many question on my mind but right in that moment, none of them really matter anymore. The only thing that's important now are Enoch's kisses and the excitement that hits me when he clears the table with his arm.

A giggle escapes my lips as Enoch nudges me back gently until I am all sprawled out on the table. "What are you doing?"

"What do you think?" For once his voice has a teasing ring to it but he doesn't expect an answer.

Not that I could focus enough to, as suddenly not only his hands but also his lips are exploring my skin.

Later that night when I am tugging Bronwyn in, she grabs my hand tightly. "Olive? Will Enoch and you leave us like Abe? Will you have a wedding cake and a little baby too?"

This is a question, I certainly didn't expect, especially as the answer is so obvious. "No, Bronwyn, what makes you think that?"

She shrugs in reply and snuggles deeper into her pillows. "We are not living in the loop anymore, so we'll grow older now."

Oh this is where that was coming from. Apparently, we didn't make it quite clear that we would stay in Esmes loop - temporary.

„Oh no, don't worry about this." I reach out and stroke one of her curls out of her face. „We will not age that much until we make it to Scotland. It's actually only a few more days."

She yawns loudly. „So you will stay with us forever?"

Forever - that's actually a pretty strong word. It's so final and scary.

„Of course, you are my family." I kiss her forehead gently. „Go to sleep now."

Bronwyn nods with another yawn and finally closes her eyes, letting go of my hand in the process.

I wait another second before getting up and slipping into my own bed. I needed some time to think and with the older kids watching a movie and the little ones asleep, I actually had it.

Bronwyn's questions hit me right in the gut. I didn't expect it and actually, I didn't even realize the possibility that this lack of a loop offered us.

When I was a little girl, I had always dreamt of getting married and having kids of my own one day. But then from one day to another, this option was entirely off the table as Miss Peregrine saved me and introduced me into her world. It was hard for me to accept at first that I would never be able to have a family, to never age or get married, to be stuck at the age of a sixteen years old teenager. The only comfort I had back than was that I had already gained a new family in Miss Peregrine and the other kids, although it wasn't the one I longed for.

Now, living out of the loop, the option was once more on the table and I didn't even realize it. I mean, I could try and ask Enoch to leave with me. We could move back to Cairnholm and built us a home together. We could see where things are going if we had a chance in real life to have an actual relationship. We could get married and have kids once we are older and still visit Miss Peregrine and the others. It would be nice, I am sure of it.

Yet, I know that this is a dream and nothing more. Being realistic, I know that Enoch would never even consider it. He loves Miss Peregrine and the kids even if he would never admit it. They are his family and despite all, he's loyal to them and puts them above all.

So no, Enoch and I will never have a wedding cake and a sweet little baby but maybe that's for the best.


End file.
